Supporting your partner through pregnancy

Pregnancy happens to one body, but becoming parents happens to both of you. Here's how to be a real partner in it.

Go to the appointments

Go to as many prenatal visits as you can. You'll hear the same information, you can ask your own questions, and your provider will know you as part of the team. If you can't be there, ask what was discussed. Don't wait to be told.

Take things off their plate

Fatigue and nausea are real, especially early on. Take over the tasks that are hard to do right now: cooking, cleaning the litter box, carrying groceries. Don't wait for a list. Notice what needs doing and do it.

Learn the warning signs

Serious complications can come up during pregnancy and in the year after birth. Learn the urgent warning signs together, and speak up if something seems wrong.

Prepare for labor together

• Take a childbirth class together.
• Read the birth plan and understand why each preference matters, so you can advocate for it.
• Pack the hospital bag, plan the route, and install the car seat early.

Look after the mood as well as the body

Pregnancy and the postpartum months can bring anxiety and depression, for both of you. Ask how they're really doing, listen without trying to fix everything, and encourage talking to a provider if low moods last more than a couple of weeks.

And look after yourself

You'll be more useful if you're rested and have your own support. It's okay to feel nervous. Talk to other parents who've been there.